


When There’s Nothing Left; What Are We?

by ChloeKilledJ



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Afterthoughts, Angst, Hope, Infinity War spoilers, Reunion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 15:18:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14523462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChloeKilledJ/pseuds/ChloeKilledJ
Summary: His eyes are searching when he speaks, voice quiet and gentle. Like he’s picked out the words months ago and is trying to remember how it starts.“Tony-“





	When There’s Nothing Left; What Are We?

**Author's Note:**

> Strong Infinity War spoilers, not even a fix-it fic just a movie afterthought. I got emotionally overwhelmed with what Steve and Tony’s reunion could look like if Marvel would stop being weak on letting their male characters have stronger emotional moments with each other, and not just their love interests or “kids”. This can be heavily shippy if you want but it was written platonically. Please leave a comment/kudo if you enjoyed!

It’s been a long few days.

They’re at the Avengers compound, Stark just finished his interstellar flight with the blue woman who took off almost immediately on her own again, maybe she had better things to do. Tony couldn’t imagine what, everyone she ever knew was gone. He’s had his cry, quite a few sporadic hours of it, but he’s not okay. Tony is sure he’s never really going to be. But the first step in fixing this was going home, so that’s what he did.

Cap must have had the same thought.

They stand now, Tony alone on one side of a dusted conference room and Cap, the regular team of criminals behind him reduced to Natasha, doesn’t say anything. Tony can’t move, his joints frozen in place as he tries to remember what seeing Captain America in the flesh ever felt like.

Trying to remember back when they sat in this room to get yelled at by Fury for expensive mistakes in the field like he wouldn’t be footing the bill, to save the world from small and big dangers alike. When there wasn’t this chasm between them so deep it was suffocating.

Just on sight alone his chest hurts, the phantom pains of the now-missing shield breaking into his arc reactor causing him to wince. His hand drifts to the nanoparts housing and just sits there. If Cap realizes why, he still doesn’t say anything, his face hard. Solemn.

“I’m gonna leave you to it boss,” Nat, knowing as ever, simply leaves.

His eyes are searching when he speaks, voice quiet and slow. Like he’s rehearsed his words for years but can’t quite remember how they start.

“Tony-“

Oh god no, not after everything. Tony can’t help the immediate shakes that overwhelm him. He lets out a stuttering breath and looks away because Cap can’t look at him like that. Cap takes a step closer and Tony chokes. He remembers so instantly and the fear is so much faster than his line of logic. He slams a palm down on the table and backs away fast, almost tripping over his own feet, eyes wild and so deeply, deeply afraid, other hand held up and out in an effort to keep Cap far.

The regret is written across Cap’s face. Tony knows his own must mirror it. Years of this. Of missing him so damn much and seeing that face in his worst nightmares. Mixtures of Obie ripping his arc reactor out of his chest and Captain America trying to break it apart with the one thing that once grounded them. Tony’s heart breaking over and over and over again because he couldn’t do better. Be better. Because he couldn’t fix something for once and its cost him goddamn everything.

He grips his left hand, the ashes mostly gone, but he still feels them. It burns his skin.

Cap’s voice breaks, and when he looks up, his eyes and cheeks are red. Hands dangling at his sides useless and head low. Voice so, so quiet. Lost.

“Tony,”

Cap tries again, he takes another slow, slow step towards Tony, who this time, doesn’t move. He knows he’s not here to hurt him again, even if by being here he’s doing exactly that. Too much has happened, once world-shattering arguments of old becoming meaningless blips fast. Tony feels control of his limbs return, and Cap is just a foot away, waiting. Tony doesn’t look at him, tears threatening their way out.

“Steve, I-“

Tony is encased in a bone-crushing embrace, like Steve couldn’t handle waiting another second. Like he’s been waiting two years to find a way to say this and realizes he never really knew how. Shaking arms wrap around him as the tears that were once trying forcing their way out find a uninhibited stream down. Steve chest stutters as he breathes unevenly over Tony’s shoulder, and they stand like that for god knows how long. Tony burying his face in his chest. Holding each other so close you’d think they were trying to morph into one. Their heartbreak floods into the floor and settles into their bones.

“I lost him Steve, I lost my kid. In my arms,” Tony starts, unsure of why the words come out now but unable to stop them.

“He was in my arms. Begging me to help him. God he was so scared,” his voice hitches on the last word and the sobs wrack through him much more viciously, “Steve I don’t know what to do, I don’t even know if I can...”

Steve holds him even tighter, embrace turning just shy of painful and Tony couldn’t be less aware of it.

“We’re gonna fix this. We’re gonna fix this together like we always have,” he pulls Tony away from him, just barely, to see his face. “We’re the only ones who can, so we have to.”

Tony nods, biting the inside of his cheek as he tries to quell his damn crying. Tear tracks glimmer down the sides of Steve’s face.

“Tony I’m sorry I did this to you. My mind hasn’t changed and I’m sorry it doesn’t matter now. I’m just, I’m just sorry.”

“You’re insufferable,” Tony looks up, “And I’m sorry too.”

 


End file.
